What Kids Say

A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and on.

  Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give

  him the money now, will he let us go?"

  A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon.

  "How do you know what to say?" he asked.

  "Why, God tells me."

  "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"

  A father took his 5-year-old son to several baseball games where The

  Star-Spangled Banner was sung before the start of each game. Then the

  father and son attended a church on a Sunday shortly before Independence

  Day and the congregation sang the Star-Spangled Banner, and after everyone

  sat down, the little boy suddenly yelled out, "PLAY BALL!!!"

  A 6-year-old was overheard reciting the Lord's Prayer at a church service:

  "And forgive us our trash passes as we forgive those who passed trash

  against us."

  After a church service on Sunday Morning, a young boy suddenly announced to

  his mother, "Mom, I've decided to become a minister when I grow

  up."

  "That's okay with us, but what made you decide that?"

  "Well," said

  the little boy, "I have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it

  will be more fun to stand up and yell than to sit and listen."

  A Sunday School teacher challenged her children to take some time on Sunday

  afternoon to write a letter to God. They were to bring their letter back

  the following Sunday. One little boy wrote, "Dear God, We had a good time

  at church today. Wish you could have been there."

  One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her

  small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with

  a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother

  smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't, dear," she said. "I have to

  sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky

  little voice, "The big sissy."

  A mother took her three-year old daughter to church for the first time. The

  church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle,

  carrying lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to

  sing in a loud voice, "Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you..."

  Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday

  School. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy

  lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got

  to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge, and all the

  people walked across safely. He used his walkie-talkie to radio

  headquarters and call in an air strike. They sent in bombers to blow up the

  bridge and all the Israelites were saved."

  "Now, Joey, is that REALLY what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked.

  "Well, no, Mom, but if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never

  believe it!"

  A child came home from Sunday School and told his mother that he had

  learned a new song about a cross-eyed bear named Gladly. It took his mother

  a while before she realized that the hymn was really "Gladly The Cross I'd

  Bear."

  Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms.

  Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday

  School teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told that if I made

  ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Bobby looked up

  into her face and replied, "Well, Ms.Smith, you can't say you weren't

  warned."